Straight to the moon! And then to the grave?

“Wow wee! Moonshot really puts beer on the map!” said Caitlin C. on the Moonshot official website. And, according to Joe B.: “It’s about time someone put together the two greatest things on earth. This is my new ‘signature’ beer.” I’m given a word limit on these things so I’m just going to leave those to you to dwell on as I have. I feel as if they make fun of themselves without me really having to say anything. Although I might have agreed with Joe when I was 17… 

There’s a new bandwagon rollin’ through the neighborhood that is our great U.S. of A. and I can’t really say that I’m all that surprised by it. We all know and probably don’t love – but, have at the very least experimented at times with – those crazy caffienated alcohol beverages like Sparks, Tilt, Joose, and the like. 

But this Moonshot thing is totally different because (according to the website) it’s a premium beer that also happens to be caffeinated as opposed to the blatantly alcoholic character of the highly caffeinated malt liquor Sparks (the likes of which I am currently testing to see can be used to get stains off of my walls). I say according to the website because they unfortunately do not yet distribute to states other than Wisconsin, Georgia, New York, and its base state MassachusettsStraight to the moon! And then to the grave?

Moonshot isn’t the only “premium” beer of its kind, though. Bigger brewing companies in North America like Molson, Labatt, and Anheueser-Busch have all come out with some other fruity (literally) versions of caffeinated beers. 

The thing is, though, that the FDA announced in November of 2009 that it was going to begin reviewing and testing these new caffeinated alcoholic beverages because of the fact that not only did they question the legality and safety of the mixture of these two drugs and were not convinced that these drinks did not qualify as Generally Recognized As Safe (GRAS), but they were also reacting to the letter they received in September from 18 Attorney Generals and one city attorney who all expressed their concern about the combination. 

The concerns put forth regarding the safety of mixing these two chemicals are legitimate. Its official name is Combined Drug Intoxication (CDI) and deaths resulting from this are considered to be relatively low across the nation, but are on the rise according to medical studies done by the California Pacific Medical Research Institute. And while I hate celebrities, I have learned a lot from them. Mostly things not to do – you know, like combining high levels of drugs, especially ones that are opposites like stimulants and depressants (Thanks, Mitch Hedberg!... Too soon?). There’s also the fact that being stimulated by caffeine while drinking can easily lead to excessive drinking and intoxication as it seems as if you’re alert enough to just keep on going way past your normal limit. 

Let me be as outright as possible – I love caffeine. I mean, I really love caffeine and I really love my beer. While the average American consumes approximately 280 mg/day, I would fall into the 20% to 30% percent of Americans that consume more than 600 mg daily. This may sound bad, but really, that’s only 3 weaker cups of home brewed coffee. Side note: consider the fact that one Starbucks 16 oz. grande has 550 mg of caffeine just begging to turn your day around. 

Partying is fun and I like to get crazy and cause a bit of a raucous every now and again, but caffeinated booze is just a bad idea, if not for the really serious consequences at least for the really awful cymbal-playing-monkey-in-your-head-hangover the following day. Either way, caffeine’s a hell of drug; I just would really prefer to keep it out of my “premium” beer.